You made a very hard decision to put your aging parent in an elderly facility. You know it’s for the best, but why are you feeling guilty about it?

They cared for you and you owe a lot to them. After all, they are your parents. And they need you the most now that they are elderly and feeble. However, you have made a very difficult decision of putting them in an elderly facility. After careful thought and consideration, you know it’s for their own good. But why are you feeling guilty?

 

Putting Senior Parents in an Elderly Facility

In the Philippine setting, it’s part of our culture to have a very tightly need family ties. Many families live with their parents and even extended family members. And when it comes to the elderly or the parents, it’s part of our upbringing to highly respect them and give back the care and sacrifices they have made in raising their children.

And perhaps, these are some of the reasons why people in general hesitate to bring their elderly parents in an adult daycare or assisted living facility, or even a nursing home.

Having other people, much more a stranger, care for our parents can seem a little more like a taboo in our society. And yet, while many have already embraced this somewhat Western idea of bringing their aging parents in elderly facilities, many still feel guilty about doing so.

 

Accepting the Decision as the Best Choice for Everyone

Despite these notions and traditions, it can’t be denied that being in a sandwich generation of caring for aging parents while bringing up your own kids and starting a family–this can all be demanding. There are challenges to both. Your time away from work would have to be spent going back and forth between your kids and your parents, and this can sometimes be overwhelming.

Still, the reality is, trying to care for your elderly parent at home in this scenario can be dangerous, if not nearly impossible. This is why many elderly facilities such as Blessed Home are available to provide nursing home, adult daycare, and assisted living services with flexible setups to best suit your needs.

But first, let’s take a look at the 3 common reasons why people feel guilty about putting their elderly loved ones in senior homes or facilities.

 

3 Reasons Why People Feel Guilty

Know that you are not alone in feeling these feelings. There are those who feel the same way. Read on to find out more.

1. You feel like you failed to do your duty. As a son or daughter of your elderly parent, not being able to personally care for them must feel like a failure or shortcoming on your part. In our society, it’s like an unwritten rule or an expectation after all.

However, what you have to remember is you did not fail as a caregiver, much more as a child of your parent. You are giving them the best care where they can be safe and better looked after. Their needs will be met and they will be around other people so they will be engaged and not feel isolated or lonely. With the right elderly facility, you can do this.

2. You are not being a good child to your elderly parent. Remember, each family’s situation is different. Only you know the whole story. So, it’s not fair to compare yourself to others. Moving your elderly parent to a facility protects both yourself and your parent and they are getting the best care that they need. And if you can’t protect your own health, you will eventually not be able to be in the best position to care for your parent.

3. They wouldn’t have gotten worse or felt miserable if only you hadn’t made the move. 

There will be times when your elderly parent may have gotten sick while in the facility and you will blame yourself for this. It’s not fair to you. Nobody can control the situation, and you made the decision based on what you know is the best for them and for your own family.

It’s natural to second-guess yourself, but remember, no one can predict the future.

The best thing that you can do once you make the decision is to make sure you move them to a trusted and reliable elderly care facility such as Blessed Home.